“I’m going to hurt her” he says to me as he watches me head out of the kitchen.
I had disengaged from the kiss that was most likely going to end badly and had been running to my room to escape from my own foolishness when he says those words.
I halt, turn to face him and say “Dipo, you won’t…try not to”
He shakes his head and that moment, I know I’m in trouble.
“You know me Dolapo. This isn’t who I am. When I started to have doubts about us, I ended the relationship. Now I’m having second thoughts about Angela. I feel like I need more time”. He says and I run to him and hold his hands
“It is two days to your wedding! You can’t do this! This isn’t a movie” I say to him, hoping that he would get over this moment and be reasonable.
“I’m not going to talk you into this madness Dipo. If you think I’d support you breaking her heart and walking away because I showed up, then have another thing coming. You started this and you will end it!” I cut in and then stop when I realise I am raising my voice. It is getting late and I shouldn’t be talking so loud. I don’t want to wake the household and have them wonder what we are doing here all alone after the crazy day we all had.
“You are sounding like you want me to marry her” he says quietly and I am thrown off balance for a few seconds. I don’t know what to say, I am stunned! I wasn’t expecting that.
He continues to speak “you can tell the whole world you came here to wish me a happy married life but you know deep down it wasn’t for that”
“Excuse me?” I found my voice and I can’t believe he is making me seem so needy. Like I need him so badly that I came all the way to throw myself at him.
“Dolapo, you don’t want me to marry Angie and that’s the truth”
“Dipo if you need a reason to make a stupid decision, do not blame it on me.” I respond. I’m getting angry.
There’s silence for a while and during this period I try to calm my nerves. What is going on? Why in the world am I here?
For the first time since I made the decision to attend this wedding, I tell myself that I am utterly stupid.
“What are we going to do?” He asks me, uncertainty in his eyes.
“Marry her” I say to him.
“You are being selfish Dolapo” he replies and I wonder how. I’m being selfless dashing him out to Angie not selfish. “You don’t want the world to hate you for this. That’s why you want me to marry her” he adds and I can’t help but agree because it is the pure undiluted truth.
“Dipo, we can’t do this. We can’t let this all end. I’m leaving tomorrow morning like I said earlier, please make it work with your bride and forget all of these” I say to him and he nods and smiles sadly.
Again, he reaches forward, grabs me and kisses me. This time It is like he is trying to pass a message across, but I can’t say what it is.
I wake up quite early and jet out. It would be a long journey back to Lagos and I leave home early enough.
I don’t say goodbye to anybody. Not Dipo, not his mom, not Angie. I slipped a note under Angie’s door that reads “Take care of him” but I didn’t say goodbye or anything related to it.
As I drag my small box and handbag out of the compound, memories of Dipo and I come flooding through and I try to fight back the tears that are trying so hard to fall.
I remember the first time we met, our first kiss, our first real date, our first everything and what eventually tore us apart. I remember the past few days and last night.
When I realise I can’t take it anymore, I stand on the road and cover my hands with my eyes as I let the tears flow freely.
He’s gone. Forever. Why did I let him? Why did I let him become Angie’s? Why didn’t I fight harder? Why did I come here? Why is it so hard to let go? Would I feel better?
A few people walk by and send me concerned looks but I quickly find my tissue paper and I clean my face while I scan the area for a taxi.
One eventually slows down and I get in.
“I love you” I whisper as the driver makes his way to the park.
“Are you okay Dolapo?” Dammy’s concerned voice asks over the phone and again I feel like crying.
“I’m not Dammy…I don’t know why and I don’t know if I’m even allowed to feel this way but I’m not” I reply, trying hard not to cry again.
Dammy sighs and continues to talk “I knew it would be hard for you. But are you sure you are doing the right thing?”
“By leaving? Yes I am. I’m giving them the opportunity to be happy” I answer.
“At the expense of your own happiness” he says
“Dammy, I am not the other woman. I’m not the woman who ruins the relationship because she wants the man…”
“No you aren’t the other woman. You are the main woman. Whether you leave today or not, Angie would forever be the other woman in Dipo’s world”
I don’t say anything, I ponder on his words. Oh my heart is going to break. Its like one year ago all over again.
“Should I pick you up at the park in Lagos?” He asks me
“Yes” I reply.
“I love you Dolapo. Be safe” he responds and I nod like he can see me.
I sleep all through the journey back to Lagos. I don’t want to think of Dipo, so I sleep off. Sleeping didn’t help much though as I see him in my dream all through.
I’m just messed up. Maybe time would heal me; maybe burying my head in work will help.
Dammy is at the park as he promised and when I sight him, I run into his arms like a little child and lean on him while fresh tears begin to form. He kisses my head and holds me there while I cry.
We eventually make it to his sleek Range Rover after I’ve shed enough tears to bathe a baby.
While we drive to his, I thank God for the first time ever that Dammy is an actor. That is the reason he can have so much time on his hands for me.
I listen to him tell me his planned itinerary for us in the next one week. It includes attending the entire classy red carpets event he’s been invited to as an A-list actor and travelling to Ghana and South Africa. I laugh for the first time in days, the blogs and media would have a filled day reporting this.
“Guess what? I made a playlist of all your fave songs here…you gats to feel better,” he says as he connects an auxiliary cord to his phone and his music player and the amazing voice of Waje fills the car.
I smile and hold his hands tight, he smiles back and winks at me.
“I got you” he mouths and I’m glad that he’s there for me. It makes me feel somewhat better.
My phone rings and I pick it to check, it is Dipo’s mom.
“Hello ma” I say immediately I pick the phone.
“Are you with Dipo? Because he is not picking his calls and he’s not home. We’ve been looking for him for hours” she says and I frown. Now that’s strange.
I’m interrupted by someone who walks into the room Dipo’s mom is calling from.
I hear her say.
“Dolapo, what do you know about this?”
“Know about what ma?”
“They say he’s left the country. He dropped a note for Angie that he’s left the country. Please come here now. Where are you?”
My jaw drops as I turn to face my best friend. What the heck does Dipo think he’s doing?